Positive Parenting fundamentals

July 5, 2022

What exactly is positive parenting? What methods are associated with it? What is itsphilosophy? Is it a prerequisite for successful parenting? Is it right for me and my family?

In order to be able to adhere to a certain model of parenting, we must first be able to understand it so that it can become a natural part of your daily life. And positive parenting and its methodology can be used with ease once you get the hang of it.

Positive parenting has its roots in the work of the Austrian psychologist Alfred Adler in the 1900s. He believed that children have a real need to feel connected to the people around them. When they are in a supportive and encouraging environment, they thrive and are less likely to exhibit ‘bad behaviour’.

Often our natural position as parents is to focus on our children’s mistakes and criticize what they’re not doing right. But shifting the focus to their strengths and to what they actually do well is the foundation of this parenting style.

Positive parenting approaches can vary slightly, but the main idea is to emphasize positive interactions. You recognize, reward and reinforce positive behaviours and impulses. You strive to show empathy and offer love and support. You also create an environment that makes it easier for your child to cooperate with you and follow directions more calmly.

When a parent encourages a child’s positive efforts, their unique personality, abilities, talents, and skills, it helps them thrive and stimulates their growth in that direction.

Studies show that using positive parenting strategies with infants and toddlers:

  • improves social-emotional development and reduces disruptive behaviour, e.g. attention problems, hyperactivity, aggression, acting out, separation stress, and externalizing problems
  • positively affects cognitive outcomes in older children (18, 24 and 36 months)
  • improves their ability to cope with stressful situations;
  • Helps them understand emotions and are more empathetic towards others
The philosophy of positive parenting is simple: Focus on the good and on your child’s positive attempts and encourage them instead of focusing on their weaknesses, outbursts, and what they can’t handle.

 The basics of positive and successful parenting can be divided into the following categories:

  • Unconditional love
  • Patience
  • Empathy
  • Understanding
  • Borders
  • An example

 There is a misconception that positive parenting does not include discipline and allows all behaviours. This is not the case at all. Discipline is simply achieved by setting clear boundaries and above all based on our personal example. A parent is not only their children’s best friend, they are their RESPECTED guide and teacher. He is loving, patient, fair, but also strict when necessary. The root of the word ‘discipline’ means ‘learn’. It is something our children need to learn and we to teach.

Positive discipline is a way to teach and guide children by showing them what behaviour is acceptable in a way that is firm but yet gentle.

 In positive parenting, there are no bad children, only good and bad behaviour.

 It emphasizes the communication of clear parental expectations, cooperation between parent and child, praise and encouragement for desired behavior, and avoidance of harsh consequences such as physical punishment.

 Some of the more widespread methods associated with positive parenting are:

  • Distraction/Re-direction,
  • Offering two options
  • The hug method
  • The power of words
  • Our way of expression
  • Attention
  • The Mind-Body-Soul philosophy

Download our positive parenting app-course that covers the basics and offers many real-life examples and methods that you can use right away. It’s called Ommm positive parenting and is available for both Android and iOS.